Today I woke up angry. I won't go into the details of who/what/why...but a family member did something that upset me. This person has exhibited this same pattern for as long as I've known them (my entire life). I've realized it is up to me to change and grow and manage my expectations. Because that is the only thing I can do. This realization that I am the one who needs to do the work to stop allowing this person to hurt me is not necessarily an AHA! moment for me - I've known this for a long time. But maybe I am now in a space where I will finally begin this work. Getting back into a regular yoga practice recently has reminded me of this sacred space of self love, reflection, and attention. Breathe Yoga is a magical place, and I am so grateful I have connected with the studio owner, Sue. She is one of those people who I just felt an instant connection with and trusted immediately. Anyways, so at yoga class this morning... It was a Sivananda Hatha Flow, which is a slower paced class, and Sue was teaching. The class was beautiful, and exactly what I needed to slow my thoughts. At the end of class we did a group OM, and Sue played some kind of bowl like ringing instrument (reminder to me to look up the name of this instrument and the saucer shaped drums). Then Sue told us to think about positive affirmations, and begin our days this week by saying "all beings deserve compassion". This obviously made me think about the person who I'm struggling with. Having compassion for someone who is hurting you is really difficult. Our ego wants to protect us, and so it tells us that that people who hurt us do not deserve our compassion, love, and attention. But this is in fact the exact opposite of true. Those who hurt us are the one who deserve our compassion the most and they present an opportunity to challenge our ego. As all the yogi's are putting on shoes and coats, one woman was talking about compassion and her teenage grandchildren. She said "Compassion can mean saying to someone: don't be an asshole". We all laughed. This is so true. We don't have to endorse negative behaviors to be compassionate. And this is exactly what I needed to hear today.
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